Sunday, June 03, 2012

Willingness to change

I had an experience this weekend which has caused me to reflect. My struggle with depression began when I was a little girl. I remember being mostly sad, burying myself in books to escape and spending hours and hours reading every night, not sleeping enough. Parent's separation, access visits, divorce, teen angst, my father's suicide, struggling with year 12, trying to please everyone else, I probably could have done with some counseling. It is not really surprising that when having kids without much extended family support, the walls crumbled.

In studying psychology, the biggest lesson one must learn while dealing with other people is a recognition that no one can help someone unwilling to help themselves. When rebuilding resilience after ceasing medication, I think it is important to remember that not everyone is willing to help themselves.

When our mental resilience is fragile, removing ourselves from conflict in order to build extra structures to support our resilience is a retreat of self care and strength. There is little virtue in denying recognition of the choices made regarding our mental health. Ultimately, everything is a choice, including the choice to help ourselves. And to help ourselves we must choose to surround ourselves with people who will help, not hinder, our progression through to mental stability.

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